The Meanest Thing To Say / Lavatory Story

The Meanest Thing To Say: Little Bill and his friends are playing a game portraying pirates when their teacher, Miss Murray, introduces a new student, Michael, who has moved to New York from Florida. During recess, Little Bill and the others try to include Michael in their basketball game, but Michael is more interested in playing a ""ranking"" game, where people are supposed to say hurtful things to one another. Although the children say they refuse to participate, Michael doesn't listen and starts saying mean things to Little Bill, who stays silent. Michael threatens that he'll just keep saying insults if Little Bill doesn't ""play"" the game tomorrow, so Little Bill attemps to practice making up mean things to say by pretending to be a pirate. April overhears her brother acting out of character and tells their parents; when Big Bill learns of Michael's games, he explains how ""ranking"" used to be a popular game when he was a boy, too, and that he always won his matches by countering his